My Name Is ___________.

parkingstrange:

giant-tic-tac:

liqhters:

My best friend sent me this tutorial of her doing her eyebrows and I thought you all would find it useful xoxo

Im dead

this is amazing

seulementpourlesamoureux:

thepondsaregone:

thorinoakenbutt:

castielandpie:

poryqon:

it bothers me that Kansas and Arkansas are not pronounced the same

I’m from the UK and I have been pronouncing Arkansas as Ar-Kansas my whole life

For all my non-american friends, Arkansas is pronounced ark-an-saw

WHAT

WHAT

darecrow:

Imagine being pregnant in new york

and your husband gets a cab for you and you’re rushing to the hospital when

"wELCOME TO THE CASH CAB"

luciferssugardaddy:

when you see a fine booty in the street but you are with your parents

image

nerdofchaos:

recreationalcannibalism:

the-adequate-gatsby:

stultifyandstupefy:

derpes:

And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”

And Abraham replied, “What.”

God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.

And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”

To which they responded, “Gay.” 

And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.

see you all in hell

hanukkahlewinsky:

is this what having a penis is like 

image

perfectvic:

LITERALLY MY FAVORITE

perfectvic:

LITERALLY MY FAVORITE